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Sarajane, thanks for writing! You've touched on something I've experienced, but did not realize had been scientifically documented. (S's post is copied at end...) Invariably, xy's I've played with have been able to handle louder high frequency volumes onstage than I, some by a considerable margin. (Maybe that's one reason why I'm into bass %^). This doesn't mean I don't like it totally intense and balls to the wall! Plus, overall I think my musical tastes are usually as out there as anybody's. So it may well be that, as you suggest Sarajane, in some situations volume can have more to do with discomfort than musical content. Non-musicians may not necessarily be able to articulate the difference. However, some people are just more into mainstream stuff than others (re the bedraggled "Anti-Spouse Forces Theorem" thread). Developing a taste for more fringe and eclectic music is a not only a function of personality, but also of experience and exposure. For instance, recently when I listened to what had been a favorite cd for the first time in about 15 years - I was really surprised how slick and unimaginative it sounded now. (I got off on *that*?) Guess it's mostly because I've been listening to and playing more experimental stuff in the interim. That's a good sign! The point is, if one's significant other/friend/partner isn't a musician or audiophile, maybe their lack of musical "sophistication" lies in part because they haven't had the advantage or pleasure of learning to listen in the ways that we as musicians do. If one of the reasons they are with us is because of our musical natures, maybe we can more systematically (and patiently!) help them develop that part of themselves as well. laurie Sarajane's post: Dear Loopers The recent "my girlfriend" thread reminds me of the old folk song "momma don't allow no guitar playing round here". But so far, no one has mentioned the fact that there are actual physical differences in HOW men and women perceive sound....for instance, female ears are able to hear in higher ranges than most males. This effect is especially pronounced at times of hormonal surges, and many women find those high (screechy) notes physically uncomfortable. The biological reasons (and I'm not making this up; I've read the medical/scientific studies on this) behind this seem to be pointing towards millions of years of conditioning females to hear those babies (high pitched and loud in their frequencies) and it causes a certain biological trigger (make it stop!). This is especially true of REPETITIVE (ie loops, anyone?) loud, high pitched sound. And while women, especially when in MOM mode, have a certain amount of tolerance built up for repetition (Mom? Mom? Mom? Can I...Mom?)they may not always choose to seek it out recreationally.... And did anyone see the article in the newspaper this week about the inner ear differences (structureally speaking) between lesbian inner ears and heterosexual female inner ears? Seems the lesbian ears are more like men's ears......perhaps because of hormonal differences while still in the womb.... However, NO sweeping generalities can be made when talking about sensory awareness---I'm female, and I LOVE many kinds of loop music, even loud, even odd pitches....I lived with a bagpiper once, who played in the house on bad weather days. and it was great! And 17 years of listening to Bryan's music has not bored me---though there are the occasional high notes that drive me from the room.... Sarajane Helm