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Darn, Ted, this is not good. Get yourself an alo
plant ASAP and keep your fingertips coated with the goop inside the
plant...then coat the tips of your fingers with super glue before you
play.
Kris
----- Original Message -----
Sent: Saturday, April 22, 2006 5:51
PM
Subject: OT -- A GUITARISTS SECOND WORST
NIGHTMARE
DANG, DANG, DANG, DAGNBBIT!
I AM TYPING THIS MESSAGE IN
ALL CAPS (AND ONE-HANDED) FOR
A REASON. NO, IT'S NOT THAT. I JUST BURNT MY
LEFT HAND RATHER
BADLY ON THE MUFFLER OF A BORROWED LAWN-MOWER. CRAP!
CRAP! CRAP! OOOOOO CRAP! THE SUCKER HURTS TOO.
HAVE OU EVER LEFT AN
IRON TO SIT TOO LONG ON AN IRONING
BOARD WHILE IT WAS WARMING UP, OR
TURNED AWAY FROM ONE
FOR A SECOND ONLY TO SEE A BROWN SINGE MARK ON YOUR
FAVORITE SHIRT WHEN YOU PICKED IT UP?
THAT'S WHAT THE TIPS OF MY
LEFT HAND FINGERS LOOKED LIKE
WHEN I FELT THE HEAT AND PULLED IT AWAY FROM
THE MOWER
I WAS TRYING TO LEAN DOWN AND ADJUST. THERE ARE BIG NASTY
BLISTERS NOW FORMED UNDER THE BROWN SINGED PADS OF THE
FIRST THREE
FINGERS. FINGERS AND PADS I NORMALLY USE FOR
FRETTING A GUITAR AS IT
HAPPENS . . . AND TYPING ON A COMPUTER.
THE PAIN WHEN I TAKE THE BAG OF
ICE AWAY IS INDESCRIBABLE --
EXCEPT THAT IT SEEMS TO COME IN WAVES. I'M
TYPING BETWEEN
THEM RIGHT NOW. I'M NOT KIDDING. CRAP! CRAP! CRAP! OOOOOO
CRAP! IT'S HARD NOT TO LAUGH AT MY OWN GROSS STUPIDITY.
I HAVE TEENAGE
SONS. THEY SHOULD BE MOWING THE LAWN
FER #$%&*!@! SAKES!
ANYWHO,
ARE THERE ANY GOOD HOMEOPATHIC REMEDIES OUT
THERE FOR MINOR BURNS OF THIS
TYPE . . . OTHER THAN TYLENOL
AND ALCOHOL AND LIBERALLY APPLIED ICE PACKS?
HAS ANYONE
BEEN IN A SIMILAR FIX? I DON'T THINK IT WARRANTS A TRIP
TO
THE EMERGENCY, I HAVE NO INSURANCE ANYWAY, SO IT'S NOT
REALLY AN
OPTION.
I HAVE A GIG IN BOISE, IDAHO IN SIX DAYS AND ONE IN
VENTURA,
CALIFORNIA THE FOLLOWING, WEEK AND ONE BACK IN OREGON
AFTER
THAT. I DON'T PLAN ON SWITCHING TO THEREMIN OR AIR
SYNTH AT THE LAST
MINUTE. HEHEHEHEHEH, OW! CRAP! CRAP!
CRAP! OOOOOO CRAP!
I GUESS I
COULD PLAY SLIDE GUITAR IF THE BURNS DONT HEAL
ENOUGH TO BE USEABLE. I WAS
A FAIR SLIDE PLAYER (ONCE UPON
A TIME) ALTHOUGH IT'S A TECHNIQUE THAT I'D
SET ASIDE IN FAVOR
OF OTHER THINGS FOR SEVERAL YEARS NOW.
I SUPPOSE
A GUITARISTS FIRST WORST NIGHTMARE IS A LOSS OF FINGERS.
SO IT COULD BE
WORSE I SUPPOSE. ANY GOOD IDEAS? YOU FOLKS ARE
MY TRIBE. IF ANYONE HAS A
BRIGHT IDEA I'D BE GLAD TO HEAR OF IT.
THE SHOW MUST GO ON -- ONE WAY OR
ANOTHER.
tEd ® kiLLiAn
"Different
is not always better, but better is always
different"
http://www.pfmentum.com/flux.html
http://www.CDbaby.com/cd/tedkillian
http://www.guitar9.com/fluxaeterna.html
http://www.garageband.com/artist/ArsOcarina
http://www.towerrecords.com/product.aspx?pfid=2845073
http://www.netmusic.com/web/album.aspx?a_id=CBNM_17314
http://www.indiejazz.com/ProductDetailsView.aspx?ProductID=193
http://www.loopers-delight.com/cgi-bin/profiles.cgi?step=view_profile&id=121197000042
Ted
Killian's "Flux Aeterna" is also available at: Apple iTunes,
BuyMusic,
Rhapsody, MusicMatch, MusicNet, DiscLogic, Napster,
AudioLunchbox, Lindows,
QTRnote, Music4Cents, Etherstream,
RuleRadio, EMEPE3, Sony Connect,
CatchMusic, Puretracks,
and Viztas. Yadda, yadda, yadda. Blah, blah, blah.
So???
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